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How to Change Self-Destructive Behaviors



Do you have behaviours that you want to change? Perhaps you have been trying to get rid of a certain behaviour, but you keep failing at it.

I believe all of us have a desire to be great people, to be amazing people and I believe we want to change and get better. However, the journey for change needs all of us to work in the things that are not so great about our lives, and work into turning them into positive things.

I find myself pondering on the question of whether we are capable of changing something bad that we can’t’ seem to stop. and I must say, the answer is a huge yes!

How do you change self destructive behaviours into good ones

Allow yourself to feel the pain

When something is destructive in your life, it is bound to come with a certain level of pain. You need to allow yourself to feel that pain, because it is in feeling pain that you will be motivated to make the changes that you need to. Ask yourself what this behaviour is doing to you, how it is affecting your life, and only if you are ready to live a better life than the one you are living, then you will make the changes that you have to make.

Look at the problem you have

It is tempting to not look at the problems that we have, just because looking at them can be extremely scary and very uncomfortable. However, in order to make a positive change , it’s important to look at the problem, look at the magnitude of it and look at how it is robbing you of the life you could have. Running away from it, and finding excuses to distract yourself from it will only make the problem get bigger, sometimes to the point where it is completely out of control.

Related: 7 habits that will change your life for the better

Pick one thing to change at a time

When you decide to finally take a leap to making changes, you might be tempted to go all out. All that will do is make you feel overwhelmed. Rather, focus on one change at a time. Want to change your eating habits and stop eating junk? You can’t just decide to completely scrap junk off your menu, because chances are you will fail. Rather, instead of eating a slab of chocolate with each meal, decide to have one piece of fruit to replace that. It’s small changes that will help you master the change process, and give you the results that you are looking for. Want to lose weight? Don’t commit to doing gym 7 days a week. Just commit to walking say 15 min a day . . . for starters.

Commit to making the change big time

You may be keeping the change to make a small one, but the commitment must be huge, you must commit to making the change so that you do it, whether you want to or not. One of the best ways to commit to something in a big way, is to announce it to a lot of people. Have a group of people who will cheer you on as you make the change, who will hold you accountable.

Related: 7 decisions that you can make right now that will change your life

Believe that you can make the changes that you need to

Everytime you make a decision to do something good, your mind will try and talk you out of it. It will put doubts in your mind, that will tell you that you are going to fail, that will tell you that you won’t make it. But you have to learn to not listen to that negative self talk. Tell yourself that you can, and believe that you can.

Be around those who support you

You need to have people who will support you, who will encourage you to keep going, who will make sure that you don’t fail. A good friend can help you do that, or a family member. These days, you can even have support groups in the internet, or be part of a group of people who are trying to do what you are trying to do. Make sure you surround yourself with people like that, because they will encourage you when you feel like quitting.

Making positive changes is a positive step to a better you, and it can only improve your life. Changing bad behaviours to great ones take commitment but if you truly want to make a change, then you will make sure that you do.


Image credit: reclaimingfutures.org

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