20 July 2012, it is definitely a date that is going to be engraved in my mind forever. It is the day I was told that its over, for real, finally, no going back. Those words just seem to ring in my mind over and over again.
The thought of what it means is just too huge for me to comprehend, and my heart juts cannot wrap around what it really means.
It has been along time coming, the relationship was always being controlled and I would be lying if I said that this is a first, it is one of many before. What stands out for me and what makes it so final, is the fact that I too have reached that point where my heart has just had enough of the rejection and the treatment.
I guess after a while of taking something that you know is wrong for you, no matter how much you love someone, the heart gets to a point where its enough. That is where I am right now.
However, it does not make it easy. In fact it is way harder that I ever thought it would be, because no matter how things got, I thought there was a way forward. I always thought there was a chance for us to sort things out, and make it work once and for all.
So my question, for those that have gone before me and got their heart broken because of loving someone soo bad, how do you say goodbye to someone you love? How do you say goodbye to someone whom you thought would be in your life forever?
I don’t have a clue, because my heart is just not ready to let go. It’s going to be a while, but those in the know say that the following tips will help:
How to Let Go of Someone You Love
You need to remember both the good things that happened in the relationship as well as those things that were not so positive.
When a relationship fails with someone that you love deeply, most people tend to focus on the amazing part of the relationship and forget that there were parts that were not so amazing. You need to remember that the breakup happened because of something unpleasant. This is the part that you should particularly remember because it will remind you why the relationship is not necessarily the best thing for you.
Accept that losing your relationship will hurt and confuse you for a long time
Some things impact our lives so hectically, to the point where it is really hard to get over or put behind. Even though you may be carrying that hurt and working through it, it does not mean that you cannot move forward with your life or be happy with it. After the hurt or confusion, you will be happy again.
Accept the fact that you have no control on anyone, you can only control yourself.
You can only control yourself and the decisions that you make. What other people do is their decision and if they choose to walk away from you and your relationship, their reasoning has told them that it is ok. Just remember that it might not even have anything to do with you.
Rebuild yourself and your life again
The things that you go through and have gone through, such as the losses that you have experienced, the hardships, the challenges, losing your love, they all contribute to the strong person that you are. You can rebuild parts of your life, focus on your personal goals and start working on them.
Remember that it will take some time
Your relationship meant something to you, and your ex partner meant a lot to you, so you will need to give yourself some time to process it all. You might even be in shock and disbelief, so it is not something that is going to be quick and just happen, it will take some time. Be patient with yourself and be kind to yourself, it is ok to cry now and again, and it is ok to have the urges to call them or to see them. Everything is a process and even a little step in letting go will help you.
Love is a huge deal, and it is devastating to lose it. But others before you have walked that road and they made it. Please share your story in letting go, even if you are just starting out.