How to Stop Loving Someone Who Does Not Love You
It is painful to love someone who does not love you back, because you may be pouring your love on them, and they cannot return that love. It is hopeless and futile, and what you need to remember is that it is not your fault, and that there is nothing you could have done. You need to learn though to stop loving someone who does not feel about you as you feel about them.
1. Focus on the negative things about them – Loving someone is such a powerful thing, that it can be quite impossible to realise that person is not perfect. When they do not return the love that you are giving to them, you need to start focusing on some of the things that are actually irritating about them, and their flaws. It is in doing so that you can realise that they are not perfect after all, so that their amazing things do not look so amazing when the bad things come into account.
2. Get rid of everything that makes you smile when you think of them – maybe they once gave you a cd, maybe it was a handwritten note, maybe it was a teddy bear, whatever it is, it needs to go. You need to get rid of all of them, so that you can let them go in the process and so that you can allow yourself to make way for the new person in your life.
3. Avoid memory triggers that you may have – if a particular song or movie reminds you of them, stop listening to it and stop watching it. If it is a place where you used to hang out together and there are a lot of memories about it, you need to give it some rest about going there. If you have common friends, hangout with the people who are only friends with you. I think you get the picture, you need to stay far away from things that remind you of them or that make you think about them.
4. Be conscious of when you start thinking about them – this is so that when you catch yourself thinking about them, you can divert your mind to something else. When you catch your mind wandering towards them, you need to force your mind to focus on something and to think of something else.
5. Do something in a different way – Try something different, like go to a place you have never been, or use a different route to go somewhere or cook something differently. This is a sure fire way to entice your mind with something new and break some old patterns.
6. Ponder on the things that you have missing – every day you waste wanting to be with this person and wishing that they could be with you, that is energy and time that you could be spending focusing on your new relationship. The person who is going to love you back is somewhere out there, and you are stuck wasting your affection on someone else who does not appreciate you. It’s time to stop.
7. Get yourself out there – you need to get back out there where you will have opportunities to meet new people again and go out on dates. Flirt and remember how nice it is to be getting attention from someone. Who knows, you might even meet someone who is more amazing than the person you are pining after.
8. Deal with the pain of rejection – it’s hard to deal with it, so you are allowed to cry or be depressed a little. Do what you have to, to get over it, have that chocolate if you need to or have that fling, as long as you know that they are a fling and as long as they know.
With these tips, you will be able to stop loving someone who does not love you back.